Today has been very hard. Whilst at work (the other people I work with have no idea about this), I heard some ladies laughing and saying "hello, is there anybody there?". I didn't catch the whole conversation. To everyone else this is nothing.
This hit me so hard. Aria used to say this when she was unable to move. This was our que to go and get her. As she couldn't move from her bed or wherever she was, she would say "hello, is there anybody there? ".
At the time this made us smile and made us go and get her.
But, today nearly 15 months on this hit me hard. When I got in my car from work, I cried. That's all I've done since I've got home from work is cry. It's really hit me hard. I feel I'm back to the day she passed away. I hate this. I hate that I have to "live" without her.
I don't live, I muddle through each day. I take my antidepressants and hope they last me for the 6 hours I'm in work.
I really wish things were different..I even asked my husband today if he had a magic wand could he make things better.
I miss you Aria 💜💜💜💜
This is what is called a trigger in the grief community. I’m so sorry. I understand . Certain things trigger me too. I’ve actually gotten to where I don’t even want to go out much anymore. I’m afraid I’ll hear stuff that triggers me and I’ll start crying in public. It’s just awful.