I think people think grief goes within a few months or a year after losing someone. That's so wrong. My pain started when Aria passed. Its got worse over the last 15.5 months. I wish it wasn't like this.
I feel further away now from Aria. I feel guilty for laughing, for going somewhere without her. Fo enjoying myself. I really feel guilty. I really wish she was here.
Pain with grief if horrendous. It really hurts. The pain of losing her, the pain of her not being here, the pain of not seeing her playing with her toys, plus the pain of not seeing her going to school.
It's so unfair. Life isn't fair. She would have been 6 in May. Wow! I wonder what she would have liked how she would have grown up into a beautiful 6 year old.
I think of everything. What she is missing out on. What we are missing out on.
I feel guilty 24/7 about everything and anything. I hate the pain of grief ðŸ˜
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