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  • atphodgkiss

I'm struggling.

I am trying so hard every day. But I'm struggling so much recently. I just sit and cry. I'm due to go back to the doctor's soon. But, how much antidepressants can one person take. They work to a point then they stop working. It's so hard. I'm not ready for counselling. I just dont feel ready.


I've been watching Arias videos again. They make me cry, but they also make me smile. I love listening to her and watching her. It's sad that I can't make any more. But, I am glad I made what I did. They help a little. But, then I cry because I will never be able to hold her again. Some days all I wish I could do was hold her close and be with her. It's so difficult. Its just as hard 16 months from losing her to day 1. I wish there was a magic wand.


Some days I just want to sleep. But, I make myself go to work and go out. I am trying but I am struggling!


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