It's so difficult to act that I'm ok every day. I cry alone in my room or if noone is around then I cry. Everyone here seems to have moved on. I feel I'm the only one who is still stuck, longing to hold Aria again. To be with her and to look after her as a mum should look after her child.
It's so hard to be ok, when I am screaming inside. I have to be like this as I feel noone even at home really understand me now. I'm on a waiting list for counselling again. This will be grief counseling. But, in the mean time I feel like I am not ok. Noone can really help me. I have tried everything, I've tried talking to my loved ones, I've tried writing it down, I've been to the doctor's....nothing is working. I hate this.
I never would have thought by having Aria in 2018 I would lose her in 2022. Grief is like you are being eaten from the inside out...it's horrible and I wouldn't wish this on anyone ðŸ˜
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