It's so hard to live each day. Grief hits you in many different ways. You can go through the day and not think, I think that's just the meds. Then it hits you hard. You start to cry. But, grief hits you in different ways to. I've gone forgetful, I don't tend to keep infomation in, I dont remember anything anymore. I can be told something and I forget a minute later.
Today, I though I was strong enough to go through some of Arias things. I was so wrong. I moved one thing and I started to cry. I cried so much, I ran upstairs to were Aria is and I held her. I just sat crying and I held Arias Urn. As I cant hold her. This is not how to live. I sobbed holding her. Wishing and crying she was still here. Wanting her back. I wanted to scream. I placed Aria back to were we have her. Then I sat on the bed and cried more. This is not how to live.
I just hope these times will pass and I will learn to live with the grief and the pain.
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