How can I carry on without her?

I just want to scream....inside I'm screaming....I'm so broken. How can I carry on living without you? This is so hard. It's been 9.5 months of hell. I just want to hold you. I'm so scared I will forget how you talk. I'm so sacred of everything. All I do is cry all of the time. I just wish this was different.

This is braking me Aria. Mummy is trying so hard to be ok and to fight this pain. But I am broken and I feel so alone. It's horrible.

I don't know what to do! I've tried so many things to help me....nothing is helping with this pain.

The last week I feel like I am screaming on the inside all of the time....I just need you here with us Aria. You made it all ok...I feel everything is falling apart without you